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My sister asked if my cane was a 'fashion accessory' and I laughed for 10 minutes straight

So last week at my niece's birthday party in Chicago, my sister looks at my new cane with the purple handle and goes 'oh cute, is that a fashion thing now?' Dead serious. I've had MS for 5 years and she knows it. I just stared at her and said 'no, it's so I don't fall on my face in front of your kids.' She turned bright red. The whole room went quiet. Has anyone else had to explain to their own family that mobility aids aren't decoration?

2 comments

2 Comments

blake43210d ago

Had a similar thing happen with my dad last Thanksgiving in Detroit. He watched me take my walker out of the car and goes "you're really leaning into that whole thing huh." Like yeah dad I'm leaning into not breaking my hip on your icy driveway. Three hours later I tripped over a loose rug in his house and he finally shut up about it. The weirdest part is he's the one who drove me to all my doctor appointments when I first got diagnosed. It's like they just forget what the actual problem is once they see you living with it.

margaret9910d ago

Yeah, the whole "you're really leaning into that thing" line hit close to home for me. But I gotta gently push back on the idea that they forget what the problem is. I mean, maybe it's more like they get used to you managing it, and then the reality of what you deal with just... fades into the background for them? Like, they saw you at the worst part, all those doctor visits and struggling, and now that you're handling it okay with a walker, their brain kind of resets to "well, she's fine now" without realizing the walker IS the thing keeping you fine. It's almost like they see the tool as a choice instead of a necessity because you made it look easy. Not excusing your dad's comments, just saying I think some people's brains work in weird ways where they can't hold both the memory of your diagnosis and the reality of your daily life in their head at the same time.